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Oct. 4, 2016
It’s hard to see a child unhappy. Whether a child is crying over the death of a pet or the popping of a balloon, our instinct is to make it better, fast.
That’s where too many parents get it wrong, says the psychologist Susan David, author of the book “Emotional Agility.” Helping a child feel happy again may offer immediate relief for parent and child, but it doesn’t help a child in the long term.
“How children navigate their emotional world is critical to lifelong success,” she said.
opencounseling.com is a great resource for affordable counseling.
With the area code search feature, you can get a list of counselors and agencies that can provide services at low or even no cost.
Instead of being merely the receiver of the parents' psychological and spiritual legacy, children function as ushers of the parents' development.
Jenni had been in an abusive relationship with Ed for far too long. He controlled Jenni’s life, distorted her self-image, and tried to physically harm her throughout their long affair. Then, in therapy, she learned to treat her eating disorder as a relationship, not a condition. By thinking of her eating disorder as a unique personality separate from her own, Jenni was able to break up with Ed once and for all.
Between the ages of 12 and 24, the brain changes in important, and oftentimes maddening, ways. It's no wonder that many parents approach their child's adolescence with fear and trepidation. According to renowned neuropsychiatrist Daniel Siegel, however, if parents and teens can work together to form a deeper understanding of the brain science behind all the tumult, they will be able to turn conflict into connection and form a deeper understanding of one another.
“Part of me hesitates to hit the publish button today, it feels private. Is the internet the place for these things? But part of me thinks I’m not the only parent overwhelmed and honored and pumped up about raising TCKs. And this part of me wants to acknowledge that alongside other parents and our kids and to share in all the emotions of it. So here is some of what I want to say, and have said, to my own TCKs…”
“…while being "squished" in the sandwich can be overwhelming at times, that doesn't mean there aren't helpful coping techniques available to make everything a little more manageable.”
Did you know that every time you have a thought, your brain releases chemicals that have a direct impact on how you feel? Thoughts are real and powerful.
- Every time you have a thought that is good, happy, hopeful, kind or loving, your brain releases chemicals that make you feel good.
- However, when you have thoughts that are negative, mad, sad, hopeless or helpless, your brain releases chemicals that make you feel bad.
“Most psychology frameworks emphasize the importance of parenting from a “united front”. This is when parents come to a consensus behind closed doors and then present the consensus to the child. I wanted to provide a couple of communication tools that can help parents find a compromise when they do not see eye-to-eye. “